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burgers.

Started by Demon Lung, February 01, 2012, 07:01:12 PM

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Demon Lung

i have to say that i like a good burger more than just about anything. i made this burger tonight that was a symphony in my motherfucking mouth. i patty the shit up myself because those assholes at the store you cant trust them to do it right. i got some extreme sharp candian cheddar and a motherfucking deli roll. i put some chipotle spicy mayo on that shit. normally ill put potato chips on it but i didnt have any. i work the grill like no other. i can cook steaks to any temp perfect. my grilled chicken is the juiciest ive ever had. i can make a burger to any temp perfectly. i put perfect diamond marks on everything. even chicken on the bone. i havent mastered lamb yet but i will. i rock on a fucking grill

I,Galactus

Quote from: Demon Lung on February 01, 2012, 07:01:12 PMi rock on a fucking grill

Charcoal or gas?  You said diamond marks so I'm assuming not a flat-top. 

From what I hear burger connoisseur are all aboot the flat-top.  That way you don't lose no grease.

I'm a weber man m'self.  Unseasonable January temps have me seriously contemplating grillin' it the fuck up.
"Why don't you take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut? Why don't you take a flying fuck at the mooooooooooooon?"

demon gal

I like mine with extra pink slime.

mortlock

the cheeseburger is the single greatest culinary invention ever..even better than pizza..

mortlock

#4

Demon Lung

Quote from: I,Galactus on February 01, 2012, 09:59:02 PM
Quote from: Demon Lung on February 01, 2012, 07:01:12 PMi rock on a fucking grill

Charcoal or gas?  You said diamond marks so I'm assuming not a flat-top. 

From what I hear burger connoisseur are all aboot the flat-top.  That way you don't lose no grease.

I'm a weber man m'self.  Unseasonable January temps have me seriously contemplating grillin' it the fuck up.
I uSe a gas grill. Weber to be exact. Although I prefer charcoal for some things. Yes a flat top is great for a burger because it sears the juices in. I've never had a problem with my bugers not being juicy. I do like a nice rare piece of prime rib seared on the flat top

RAGER

#6
I don't eat many burgers so it is my weak spot in cooking.  I can make a pretty good burger but it's not my go to and it's not second nature for me.  They seem kind of limiting.  I'd rather get very creative with sandwiches and the like.

A good burger is much appreciated though.

It's kind of a thing in here in Portland to try and have the best $5 happy hour burger.  that makes it very cool for diners.
No Focus Pocus

khoomeizhi

i cook on coals, fuck a gas.
let's dispense the unpleasantries

I,Galactus

Quote from: khoomeizhi on February 02, 2012, 06:59:40 PM
i cook on coals, fuck a gas.

Yeah, i'm a coal man too.  I intended my earlier comment to specify this, but I forgot weber makes false grills too.

This (in my mind) is a weber:



That being said, I don't make burgers very often either and thus they aren't my strongest suit.

Any tips and tricks, DL?
"Why don't you take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut? Why don't you take a flying fuck at the mooooooooooooon?"

Demon Lung

You just have to know the spots on your grill. I time everything. It shouldn't take any longer than 10 min to make a burger

James1214

I like cooking burgers directly on my chimney starter. I load it full of good coals and fire it up, go inside and make a few patties out of good 80/20. walk back outside after 10-15 mins, or when the coals are intensely orange and incredibly hot. Throw a small grill surface on top of the chimney starter, I use a replacement grill for a mini weber. I do maybe 2 mins a side for a 1/2 lb patty, basically you are cooking over a blacksmiths furnace/sirface of the sun and it sears the meat in no time. I like this method because its so damn fast and it produces the juiciest flame cooked burgers I've ever made. I have yet to do a steak this way, but its the next thing on the list, and I'm sure will work just as well.
words

I,Galactus

Quote from: James1214 on February 03, 2012, 02:46:36 AM
I like cooking burgers directly on my chimney starter. I load it full of good coals and fire it up, go inside and make a few patties out of good 80/20. walk back outside after 10-15 mins, or when the coals are intensely orange and incredibly hot. Throw a small grill surface on top of the chimney starter, I use a replacement grill for a mini weber. I do maybe 2 mins a side for a 1/2 lb patty, basically you are cooking over a blacksmiths furnace/sirface of the sun and it sears the meat in no time. I like this method because its so damn fast and it produces the juiciest flame cooked burgers I've ever made. I have yet to do a steak this way, but its the next thing on the list, and I'm sure will work just as well.

That sounds awesome!  I never would have thought to try that.  I'm a big advocate of chimney starters.  I used to use the electric heater coil thingy, but I melted it.  Tried a chimney because it was cheaper and now I'm never going back.
"Why don't you take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut? Why don't you take a flying fuck at the mooooooooooooon?"

Demon Lung

That is a really good way to cook a filet mignon. 2 min on each side just to get a char. That includes the sides. I'm talking about a nice size steak too. If you use a small steak no longer than a min on each side

Mr Neutron

Quote from: Demon Lung on February 02, 2012, 09:36:38 PM
You just have to know the spots on your grill. I time everything. It shouldn't take any longer than 10 min to make a burger

not true, depending on thickness, burgers can easily take 16-18 minutes...
"Where words fail, music speaks."

RAGER

Sorry man.  No respected burger should take 18 minutes :-X
No Focus Pocus

Mr Neutron

you can be sorry all you want, and still be wrong.
"Where words fail, music speaks."

Demon Lung

Quote from: RAGER on February 05, 2012, 11:53:35 AM
Sorry man.  No respected burger should take 18 minutes :-X
thats what im saying. the cow has already been killed. no need to kill it again

khoomeizhi

Quote from: Mr Neutron on February 05, 2012, 08:57:33 AM
depending on thickness, burgers can easily take 16-18 minutes...

you're either grilling a meatloaf or it's not hot enough.
let's dispense the unpleasantries

RAGER

Quote from: Mr Neutron on February 05, 2012, 12:10:08 PM
you can be sorry all you want, and still be wrong.

Ok I don't want to come off too snobby but it's gonna be hard.  I am currently in the process of setting up a new snobby dining/drinking estab.  Not owned by me.  I am designing the menu and will take over executive chef duties.  It is generally accepted in the world of food by foodies and chefs that a simple thing like a burger would be vastly overcooked @ 18 minutes.  And also if ordered this way is kind of an insult to meat itself.  If someone orders a burger well done wouldn't take 18 minutes.

I won't go back and forth on this.
No Focus Pocus

Mr Neutron

Quote from: khoomeizhi on February 05, 2012, 01:15:22 PM
you're either grilling a meatloaf or it's not hot enough.

its perfect if you aren't searing the burger the entire time you are cooking it. it's indirect heat most of the time.
"Where words fail, music speaks."

GodShifter

Quote from: Mr Neutron on February 05, 2012, 08:57:33 AM
Quote from: Demon Lung on February 02, 2012, 09:36:38 PM
You just have to know the spots on your grill. I time everything. It shouldn't take any longer than 10 min to make a burger

not true, depending on thickness, burgers can easily take 16-18 minutes...

Agreed. I made some burgers just last week and due to the thickness of them, I kept them on the grill for close to 20 minutes. They weren't burnt or overdone or anything. They were just right.

Demon Lung

A quarter pound patty should take no more than 8 to 10 minutes to cook. 2 mins then turn 3 then flip and repeat. Add cheese turn the grill off and cover it. Let the cheese melt and the burger will be cook to a perfect medium. That is the way to cook a perfect burger

RAGER

Quote from: Demon Lung on February 05, 2012, 05:01:12 PM
A quarter pound patty should take no more than 8 to 10 minutes to cook. 2 mins then turn 3 then flip and repeat. Add cheese turn the grill off and cover it. Let the cheese melt and the burger will be cook to a perfect medium. That is the way to cook a perfect burger

Pretty much if even that.  If you're cooking a burger in my kitchen and it approaches the 15 min mark, I'd be asking what the fuck are you doing.  You're holding shit up and now the buns are burnt.  You're Fired
No Focus Pocus

GodShifter

Okay, Gordon Ramsay  :D ;)

Apparently, I was grilling meat loaves. They were some thick ass burgers, lemme tell ya.

khoomeizhi

long, low heat has its place, i just don't think it's burgers/ground meat.

last night cooked beef (which had been marinating for thee days) on skewers, a good distance away from a bed of coals that i fed occasionally with broken-up prunings from fruit trees (mostly peach, plum, and pear wood). it did take a while (probably at least 20 minutes, wasn't counting), but holy fuck was it tasty. pink insides still. smoky awesome exterior.
let's dispense the unpleasantries